2ww day 1

Well at least we got here! I finally had my transfer yesterday afternoon after 2 false starts.

Positive #1: I feel healthy.

Positive #2: the doctor said that it had “95% freezing and expanding” or something like that. So I said, “oh, ok…. what does that mean?” Apparently 95% of the cells are intact, and they’ll do a transfer if 50% of the cells survive. I didn’t ask anymore questions after that, but I assume that increases the chance that it’ll turn into a successful pregnancy? On top of the fact that we had particular carrier map testing to show that there also aren’t any chromosomal abnormalities with the embryo (on top of our PDG). But end of the day, the only thing that matters is a BFP. And we’ve previously transferred an amazing hatchie that didn’t work out.

So where I’m at. I don’t feel pregnant. I tell myself that I’m clinically pregnant. I don’t feel excited. I’m not doing positive visualisations. I have no implantation theme song (yes, I’ve previously had one…).

I have done some “2ww… day 5 transfer… pregnancy symptoms…etc” googling this morning. I plan to do a HPT the night before my blood test (if I make it that far – remember, I’ve never made it that far), so if it is a BFN, at least I’ll have a pre-warning. And yes, I know a BFN at home doesn’t mean a BFN blood test.

And that’s about it really. It’s  a genuine lack of excitement here coz I’m kinda expecting the worst. Hopefully the next 10 days go by quickly!

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